MACHO ke MANGKUK? Meh sini I bagi tau...

MM Still nak maintain macho ye? Even after I have specifically, clearly, explicitly informed that with me, no such acts are necessary!

Marah? Memang lah marah! Menyampah pun ada.

Nak tau tak macho tu macam mana? Meh sini I cakap macho tu macam mana, from ONE WOMAN's point of view. Ladies, if you don't agree with me, sorry lah - this is just MY point of view. Gents, if you don't agree with me, stop reading RIGHT NOW. I don't give a rat's ass this one time.

Here goes.

Taking her hand (or holding out your hand so that she can take it) and holding her hand while crossing the road? MACHO.
Crossing the road without glancing to see if she's still next to you or is left waddling behind you 200 effing meters away? MANGKUK.

Offering to take her shopping bag from her and carrying it for her (even for a short while)? MACHO.
Cracking jokes about how come you're still holding YOUR shopping bag instead of HER
holding it for you AND letting her carry YOUR shopping bag? MANGKUK tu.

Holding her hand when she's ill or calling her to find out how she's doing and sounding like you mean it (even if you don't really care that much and you're more concerned about the goal that your favorite soccer team was supposed to score at the time)? MACHO.
Txting her 'so?how u now? ok or not?' and NOT offering to see her when she needs someone to talk to after her medical checkup? MANGKUK.

Offering to take her on a picnic or a day trip to cheer her up cos she told you she needs a quick break and she's been a grumpy bitch for the longest time? MACHO.
Tarik harga and punishing her by not calling and txting her for 3 days or something cos she's been a grumpy bitch for the longest time? MANGKUK lah...

Making breakfast for her cos she's MUCH MORE cheerful after breakfast, even if it's just a cup of coffee or one piece of bread with a glass of water? MACHO.
Asking her 'Eh? You never make breakfast for me ah?' and laughing like it's the funniest joke you've made, AFTER she ironed your shirt for you? Effing MANGKUK, dude.

Slowing down your pace when you're walking together so that you CAN walk together? MACHO.

Leaving her trailing behind in the neighboring district cos your giraffe-length legs need to

maintain your manly stride? So the MANGKUK, ok?

and at the top of the dungheap,

'MESSIN WIT' HER HEAD' when she humbly asked you not to? MANGKUK la, MANGKUK!!!

Notes:
Mighty Mouse image courtesy of theanimationartgallery.com. And no, my MM tag does not refer to sweet Mighty Mouse.

My hero, Danger Mouse's image courtesy of i108.photobucket.com